Letter to Solitude

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By Zoya Amjad

Illustrations by Zoya Amjad

Illustrations by Zoya Amjad

I don’t know if I should be doing this anymore or not but I just cannot stop myself. I have been writing about you ever since I found out about your existence but writing to you is a completely different much harder task. Many pages got crumpled and thrown away before this one, and I am not sure what fate this one carries either. But I have realized such is life. You do things even when you aren’t sure. You take the plunge. And that’s what I am doing right now. I realize how you have been misunderstood by so many for so long and it is only fair that someone came out and told you the truth about you. Made you realize all the wonderful things you have done or could do. I am but a nobody however I do assure you that my words will be honest and right from the depths of my soul. I have a hard time making up compliments or any sort of conversation for that matter. You saw me trying and failing several times. You were there when all else were not and sometimes even while they were present. A point came when I gave up trying and it was in my giving up that I found you as a friend. And that is when I realized, I had been looking for company in all the wrong places. That is the only reason I was always disappointed. But I am grateful now for that disappointment for if it wasn’t for that, I would never have gone out searching for you. And in my search for you, I would never have ended up finding myself either. For it was only when the world went quiet, I could hear the sound of my own soul. I never knew it had so much to say, so much to tell me. I never knew that all that didn’t make sense could stand explained right in front of you if you could just be quiet and listen. You made me understand more than I could take and then you gave me courage to make peace with it. You taught me to look at things that otherwise went unnoticed and you made me realize how everything was just waiting to tell me a story of its own. How everything around me could be inspiring and wonderful and magnificent if one just knew the right way to look at it. In a world that often got hard to take, you taught me to build a sanctuary of my own. You restored my faith in safe havens and also myself. You made me think and then realize so many things in return. So many questions waiting to be asked. So many answers waiting to be discovered. I wish I had found you earlier my friend but is it ever too late. Isn’t it also true that the harder and longer the journey is, the more exhilarating the destination. I do not regret one bit of the troubles I had to go through in order to get to you for when I finally reached, every bit of it was worth it. I am forever in your debt!

 

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